Thursday, December 04, 2008
2:11:07 AM
Dear Father,
Let me write to you and let the words flow from my inner soul as I send my heart to Your throne. Your daughter has been peaceful for quite some time now. Days have passed by and she’s doing perfectly fine. I thank you for sending her back home to you.
I watched the pure love story of Jamie’s faithful yesterday. Their lives were born-again. Two spirits were divinely intertwined and woven to this one great life as if heaven celebrated when it happened. I remember when I saw the movie for the first time and wept unexpectedly in the living room about five years ago. I was young and I haven’t witnessed love at all. The music, the movie and the characters were remarkably spectacular simply because they cause people to change. The message of the movie undoubtedly springs hope to those who seek their soul’s safest haven. When the ultimate definition of love was displayed through the scenes, the words written in Your book were magnified to the extent of touching my obdurate interior. It served its purpose, and I applaud you for the magnificent movie. It actually convinced my eyes to look at love differently. Love that is not afraid to give and has sufficient valor to accept less return from what was voluntarily offered. You mentioned in your book that love always protects, those words make me smile. Love has the audacity to defend and shield the beloved. Father, like what Peter told you when you asked him to feed your lambs, “You know all things.” There are episodes and secret statements hidden in a person’s humanity which are veiled and buried. I would love to translate those delicate sentiments but I ran out of words. That is why I depend on your Sovereignty that even though my tears were unnamed, your being God would decipher every drop and every sob.
I found the end of my life when I found You six yeas ago. My journey ended and it was finished. Knowing your perfect love exists has overcome any hesitation of surrender. You have taken me into your arms and called me your own. And as you gradually healed the wounds of my flesh from this earthly battle, your blood covered and washed away my transgressions. Your holy blood purified me and gave me another chance at life. How can one forget that selfless act of mercy? And even if I try to disinter the reasons why you are willing to forgive us, even more than the accepted and rational measure of fair judgment, I admit that I can never. So, I hold on to your word that your love is consistent. You will never change. You will always love me. Your love will never run out and your compassions are new every morning. It’s movingly reassuring. That is why having found your perfect love made me afraid of love that is less than what I have with you. I tried to weep silently at three in the morning yesterday. I think that leaving things unchanged is far better than handing my heart to someone mortal. I’ve already found you, the best lover of souls and I don’t want to settle for anything less now. I experience your protection. I know that my heart is in your hands and you assiduously protect it. I don’t know what else to say and how I can say this correctly, but I’m afraid to be hurt. So answer me now. Tell me what to think and believe in - like what you always do and I’ll live it. I’m already happy with you Father. I know that your plans are great and your plans will not cause any pain or suffering. Perhaps, I just want you to reassure me that the life of loving another human being is safe. And as I pray for the confirmation of your words, give me the courage to follow you. I love you… so I will trust in you. Fix this heart… and prepare it.
Resting in your arms,
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